Attention!
To anyone reading this blog. At 5:40 this evening, Victor Rorg or "Uncle Vick" or "That Asshole Next Door" as some people called him, jumped his bail. His whereabouts are currently unknown.
I am Officer Beth. I am writing this report from the jumpee's home in Southern California. The same home where the body of a social worker named Tappy Marie was exhumed from the backyard several weeks ago. Escapee is thought to be armed with a small handgun, and a garden axe.
Escapee is considered psychopathic and is believed headed for San Francisco to take care of "family business" after reading recent entries in this blog.
Escapee was wearing a gray pair of sweatpants with chocolate stains on the right leg, Nike tennis shoes, a brown pullover, and a silver pinky ring.
Escapee is driving my car (a gold Lexus). License plate IAMHOTYA. Escapee claims we had a sexual relationship in a bathtub which I adamantly deny!
Officer Beth
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